letting go again

i wonder why do i keep on getting post/ qoutes about letting go? does this mean something?? am i suppose to really let go...

just read the post that i got from my friendster account...

Imagine this. In ur hand is a very preciouscreation, so fragile, so valuable that if u keepon holding, it wud either stay or fall apart. But uloved this creature so much, so much that letting itgo wud b like letting go of ur life as well. Somuch that sometimes u wished it wud b there4ever. So much that u tend to b SELFISH at timesso as u could make it stay for as long as u like.Don't we all wish something "so good" cud b4ever? Don't we all hope that happiness is thereto stay? There comes a time in our lives when wechance upon some1 "so nice"& "almost perfect" & we jz find ourselvesgetting so intensely attracted to that person(sometimes w/o even realizing it).This feeling soon becomes a part of our evrydaylives & eventually guzzles our thoughts & actionsto the extent that we tagged it as one of those "toogood to be true" things. The sad part there iswhen we begin to realize that,thisparticular person feels totally nothing butfriendship. A "thing" that wud b 4ever a "thing"nothing more, nothing less... jz a thing! You'rejz a friend, & that's d fact! Then in our desperateattempt to get closer (or at least benoticed),our efforts are still futile & we end upsorry 4 ourselves. One person said, never ever letur heart run ur life, as much as u can, alwys bsensible & let ur mind speak for itself. Try to listennot merely on what ur feelings' invoking on u as aperson but more importantly listen to reason aswell.Letting go of some1 doesn't necessarilymean u have to stop loving,it only means that uallow that person to find his/her own happinessw/o expectin him/her to come back. Letting gois not just setting the other person free (in thereal sense of it), but it is also setting urself freefrom all animosity, revulsion,& resentment thatwas long kept in ur heart. You have to let go bcosd bitterness often puts away the strengths andweakens d littlest hope, making our lives moremiserable than ever. Worst, presenting urselfas the "most affected one" sets the nastiestimpression of all time--whatta a loser! Thetrick there is...alwys remember that if u losesome1 today, it means that some1 better iscoming tomorrow. If u lose love that doesn't meanthat u failed in love...right? Jz regard it as anothermismatch of heaven! Well, u can cry of course,or whine or shout(growl even) if u have to, butmake sure that after those outbursts u havewashed away the hurt and the bitterness that thepast has left with u (easy said than done I know!).We can all survive with jz beautiful memories ofthe past but real peace & happiness come onlywith open acceptance of what reality is today.You really don't have to forget someone u love('cause it's hard). What we need to learn is how toaccept the verdict ofreality without being bitter orsorry for what we have become. I think it's betterthat we give off that dedication and love tosomeone more deserving. Hmmm..."Who could itbe?" is the next interesting question to ponder...Let go of yesterday & love will find its way back tou. And when it does, pray hard that it may b d lovethat will stay & last a lifetime...Back

***silly... and here is my horoscope for the day... ***

wonderful new day is dawning. Love, travel and wisdom are all going well for now. LET GO of what's holding you back.

*sigh* i wish life is easy...just when i really decided to let go, new things reminds and binds me closer to the person to the person i wanna let go...

exceeding limits

i can only take this much. what do i think of me? a person with no limits? as if i can take anything/everything? sometimes people can only take this much... please don't push people to their limits... people are generaljy kind but please don't abuse it...

random thought

after work today i went out with my friends.... while with them i realize some things about people.... im not talking or referring to some people in particular, just a random thought..... while waiting for some of them near the ticket booth i saw my childhood crush with his girlfriend, im not sure if it's really him coz it's been years since i last saw him. i pointed and told papa bear on the direction of my crush and he made me realized one thing.... i need a guy who can control me but at the same time giving me my freedom... quoting from him ' ung tipong mamamandohan ka pero hndi ka nasasakal'... i totally agree with him. with the type of personality that i have i really need that kind of guy...
i just want you to think about it and how would you react to this situation... if you and your friend chip in to buy a piece of bread and you have to naturally have to brake equally divide into 2 but unfortunately the bread was unintentionally unequally divided, one is bigger than the other, what would u do? get the bigger piece for yourself or offer it to your friend? if you ask me i'll offer the bigger piece for my friend. i guess i'm the martyr and sacrificing type of friend who rather think of others first than my own self....
and another thing... always know what is most important to you. once in a while pamper yourself and enjoy the fruits of you hard work. indulge in some luxuries in life. it won't hurt you to do this... again just a random thought

letting go

people asked me why i still don't have a boyfriend at this age.... i belong to the nbsb club (sorry guys i dont wanna elaborate what that club stands for...hehehe!!!) .... i'll just confess it right here.... im suffering from unrequited love, until now ....i met him 6 years ago and i'm still waiting for the ompossible to happen... i want him to be called mine....
i keep on finding fault on people who gives me special attention, people who are close to me thinks i'm looking for a perfect guy, a guy who has everything ....and they would just say goodluck for the quest for there is no such thing as a perfect guy... what they do not know is that i want no other person than the same person i still love or think that i love.... from what i know he is a playboy, he got lots of girls around him that's not surprising since he is gorgeous...dead gorgeous....
let me tell you a story, when i first met him it was my grandmother's wake, the very same day that she died.... i was on a vacation then and since my grandparents house is near the basketball court, my cousins and i decided to watch the league to lessen our grief... we we're just watching on the sidelines when suddenly this group of guys approach our group. they knew my cousins and since im just a visitor they want to know who iam.... iam the snob type of girl specially to guys. actually im not really snob it's just that im not the friendly and talkative type. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that i spent my adolescence life in an exclusive school and i don't have male friends. when we were introduced i just said hi then after thegame left the court to go back to the wake... i did not notice him because im not looking at them when they were introduce to me so when i went out again i now actually saw him.... that same night my cousin told me that someone wants to court me and my usual response is no, eventhough my cousin is building up the guy saying he is nice, cute and everything a girl would asked for a boyfriend i still said no because i want to be available for the cute guy that i just saw only to find out they we're just the same person... if i ever had any regrets in my life it would be when i turned him down... after the funeral we were not able to see each other again because i need to go back home... i tried to go back there when there is any opportunity but unfortunately there's none.... when finally i went back there hoping to see him again, i was heartbroken.... he already has a girlfriend... i saw the girl and she is pretty, i feel so intimidated and loss my self esteem, i feel like im the ugliest person around so i went back home brokenhearted for the first time and to channel out my negative feelings i tred to excel on my studies..... i did and i feel so great but deep inside im still hurting, after all those years i still want to be his girlfriend.... the last time we saw each other was 2003 and i was entertaining another person... like in soap operas...i tried to entertain other person but deep inside my mind is filled with thoughts of him... i thought we still have chance on the next day... i'll have the guts to say i like you... but unfortunately my dad decided to pack up and go home and i still have a thesis proposal to prepare so we went home. just like in any patriachal family, no one can question my father even i, who is my dad's fave can't protest... only if i knew that that would be that last time i'll see him because he'll be living in another country for good....
so i guess that means goodbye and i'm left to do the only sensible thing that any sane person will do... to move on with my life, find new inspiration in life and to LET GO!

nonsense

day begins and end....im still wearing my mask...did u ever see me cry???....i think not.....

can u remember a day when i did not smile?...when was the last time you see me frown... had u ever observed that even if im angry i'm still smiling... hahaha!!! i know i look stupid...

but u know what sometimes i asked myself... why do i always smile? am i really happy or what? i guess not... coz deep inside i feel nothing but emptiness.... if you asked me today what will make me happy., i'll just say I DON"T KNOW... even if i have the whole day to think about it i guess i'll give you the same answer.... I DONT" KNOW.... i know im not making sense right now... im just typing anything that comes into my mind... i don't care if my grammar is right after all you wont know who iam unless i reveal my self.... *sigh*... maybe im simply tired of existing, of the way i live my life.... i feel like my life has no direction, no path, no growth... sadness is drowning me.... i'm living shallow life....

im afraid of the unknown... simply im afraid.... am i normal? im afraid to take the risk, i don't want changes in my life.... i want my life as smooth as possible.... no complications, no hassles, no worries... no changes.. no downs... no nothing... i guess i'm simply asking for the impossible